Ball Girl #049: You know what’s more disappointing than season 8 of Game of Thrones?

I wanted a Ferrari - Red Bull RIVALRY. What I got was a Red Bull mafia, and a Ferrari slaughtering.

Want the scoop on sports but don’t feel like translating ‘bro’ language? You’ve come to the right place.

Can I have your number?

• 12.7%: the percentage of teams that have comeback from a 2-0 series deficit in the Stanley Cups Playoffs. The Tampa Bay Lightning just beat the house on this stat though, knocking the NY Rangers out of contention after trailing the series, you guessed it, 0-2.

NBA

*ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWN *CUE BAH NAH NAH NAH NOISE

Boston Celtics (2) vs. Golden State Warriors (2): Golden State proves that sometimes two wrongs do make a right.

• AKA this series justifies me slipping a laxative into my ex's drink right? KIDDING KIDDING! For legal reasons of course🙃. But Golden State finally evened the series back up in an epic Game 4. Things actually weren’t looking too hot for the Warriors. They went into the half trailing by five, so what changed? Chef Curry took over in the Kitchen. The demi-god (you cannot convince me this man is human) scored 43 points while looking like a snack and talking back to a vicious Boston crowd.

• So what does this mean? This series is almost certainly going to game 7. As much as I want it to be Golden State that takes home the ultimate title, this is really anyone’s bone.

NHL

NY Rangers officially knocked out of the Stanley Cup playoffs by Tampa, and their performance is shockingly similar to my last relationship

• A flame that burned bright, fast, anddddd then went out in about 7 days time. But as the optimist at heart that I am, here’s the silver lining. the Rangers are a ridiculously young team and were never expected to have made it this far. They did out of sheer guts and their amazing goalie, Igor Shesterkin--this men CARRIED all the boys on his back. They’ll be coming back next season even better with a serious chance for another cup run.

SO the Stanley Cup Final (!!! NO 'S' AT THE END Y’ALL! ) is about to begin and just like every Twilight fan, it's time to pick a side. Let me break it down for you

• TEAM EDWARD, AKA The Tampa Bay Lightning. The Lightning have won the Stanley Cup for the past two years in a row. Like Edward, they are a strong favorite who have history on his side- guess that happens when you’ve been alive since 1901. The Lightning also play from the shadows, much like our favorite vampire. They aren’t one to attack and draw attention to themselves but hide behind their brick wall of a goalie Andrei Vasilevskiy.

• TEAM JACOB, AKA The Colorado Avalanche. The Avalanche haven’t won a Stanley cup for 20 years- they’ve long awaited this opportunity. Much like how Jacob long awaited the opportunity to fall in love (with Bella’s future daughter…..ewwwww). Their fire power is in their high-scoring offense- like Jacob, when they want something, they make MOVES and find opportunities to randomly remove their shirt.

So girlies, who will it be? Edward or Jacob?

MLB

Drama in the National League West

• The San Francisco Giants (3rd in the NL West) swept the Los Angeles Dodgers (1st in the NL West), wrapping up the series sweep with a 2-0 win over LA on Sunday.

• LA outfielder Chis Taylor doubled twice for the Dodgers before having to exit the game after a brutal collision in the bottom of the 8th with a yellow car in left field (check it out below).

• This sweep allowed the San Diego Padres (2nd in the NL West) to come within one game of taking the Dodgers 1st place spot in the division.

Hotlanta🔥

• Sweeping the Pittsburgh Pirates, the Atlanta Braves finished up their 4 game series with a 5-3 win over the Pirates on Sunday.

• The reigning World Series champion Atlanta Braves have been tearing it up since June 1st and are on an 11 game winning streak.

• Only 6 games away from taking 1st in their division, Atlanta is creeping up on the NL East-leading New York Mets.

F1

Ferrari’s Azerbaijan Grand Prix performance is more disappointing than when I learned Zac Efron didn’t actually sing in High School Musical

• Ferrari’s Charles Leclerc started out in pole position (for new readers, that means first) while teammate Carlos Sainz was in 4th. By lap 20, both of these Ferrari drivers were OUT, Sainz from a bump in with the barricade, Leclerc because of engine failure (his car was literally bellowing smoke….). Red Bull meanwhile finished in a picture perfect #1 and #2 with Max Verstappen and Sergio Perez respectively while Mercedes' two drivers finished in 3rd and 4th.

• Why this matters: Leclerc was winning the the driver’s championship race by a significant lead but he has now had two DNFs in his last three races, aka, two races that netted zero points. This is a brutal blow for our favorite f1 pretty boy, and a massive victory for our favorite f1 villain Max Verstappen who now leads the driver’s championship by a whopping 20 points…Since when did we let villains win folks?! Disney, I’d like a refund

• My personal race highlight however? When Alpha Tauri used DUCT TAPE to fix Yuki Tsunoda’s car.

Golf

Forget Love Island: TV’s hottest new drama is the LIV golf circuit

• Charles Schwartzel won the first ever LIV golf event this past weekend and took home a $4M money bag. But honestly? No one’s watching Schwartzel. They are watching the insane tension between the LIV tour and the PGA tour

• What is LIV other than a night club in Miami: The LIV tour is a new golf tour that was started to grow the game of golf and appeal to a younger generation. That’s the PR schpeel. What it also is, is a way for Saudi Arabia to diversify their money and put it into *cough* more appealing public things. For my Ozark fans out there, this is equivalent to Wendy Bird wanting to start a foundation on behalf of the drug cartel :)

• Why does the PGA Care: PGA is pushing back that these golfers are accepting blood money and diluting the game of golf. The golfers who are joining the LIV tour are saying….yea but we are getting PAID so much more and is golf not our career? What employee wouldn’t take a 5x higher salary?

• So what’s the beef, and are we talking Angus or wagyu? Anyone who joins the LIV golf tour circuit is banned from PGA events- talk about awkward considering that 20 of the top 100 players in the world so far have said ADIOS to the PGA. There will surely be more in the weeks to come.

Must Watches This Week

Monday, June 13:

• 9:00pm ET, Boston Celtics vs. Golden State Warriors, NBA: whoever loses this will be on the brink of elimination and more importantly, humiliation so the stakes are HIGHHHER than a your liberal arts best friend on 4/20

Time Out for the Tea

Walmart expands beyond grocery and pharmacy into….the NFL!?!

• That’s right folks. Walmart heir Rob Walton has agreed to terms with the Denver Broncos to purchase the NFL team for $4.65 BILLION dollars. Did I stutter? Nah fam. This purchase marks the most expensive one for any team in North America…..ever. Best part is? Rumors have it that Walton bought the team as a gift for his son-in-law. Dad if you are reading this, can I please get the Dyson blow dryer set now? I mean its not like I’m asking for an NFL team sheeeeeesh