Ball Girl #055: Hot girl summer is also for the boys

The young NBA star has had a serious summer glow up ladies. Which I hate because that decreases my chances of dating him (or him dating me lol), and increases Kendall Jenner’s

Can I have your number?

• (At least) 80: Number of matches that Novak Djokovic has won at all four Grand Slam events. He became the first player to claim this accolade in his win against Soonwoon Kwon on Monday.

TL;DR

⚾ 12 players and coaches were suspended by the MLB after a team-wide brawl this past weekend. Read on for the details.

🏀Kyrie Irving accepts his player options for the 2022-2023 season with the Brooklyn Nets, meaning that teammate Kevin Durant will also stay (the two were a package deal)

🏁 British Grand Prix kicks off this weekend and all eyes are on the usual suspects, Max Verstappen, Charles Leclerc, and Sergio Perez to finish on podium. But this course is long, fast, and trecherous so don’t be surprised if we witness some spice.

🏒 Colorado Avalanche are riding that rocky mountain high after winning the Stanley Cup this past Sunday

🎾 Wimbledon Tournament began this past Monday and since curtain call, Serena Williams has been eliminated, and Novak Djokovic almost was but prevailed.

NHL

Avalanche on high; world responds with puns

• After the game, Cale Makar was announced the 2022 Conn Smythe award winner — aka, the MVP of the entire postseason.

• In the aftermath of the win, fellow Denver teams responded with punny congratulations to their neighbors (🎵 not us weeding out the real Blink-182 fans 👀).

MLB

Winker said “hold my hoops”

• 12 players and coaches were recently suspended by the MLB after a massive, benches-clearing brawl between the Mariners and Angels on Sunday.

• Tensions skyrocketed when Angels pitcher Andrew Wantz struck Mariners hitter Jesse Winker with a pitch in the leg. Winker was not happy about this and started to get aggressive. Seconds later, both teams’ players and coaches were on the field in full attack mode. Finally, some excitement on a baseball diamond! Just kidding…

Vladdy is a baddie

• Vladimir Guerrero Jr, aka Vladdy Jr, hit an RBI single last night (RBI is like an assist in other sports) to get the Blue Jays a comeback win against the Boston Red Sox. The Blue Jays, currently 2nd in their division, now lead the Sox (3rd in the division) 2-0 in this 3-game series. As for Vladdy, I’ve never seen anyone embrace the gatorade pour so eagerly…

Golf

Coming up this weekend…

• The John Deere Classic (PGA)

• LIV Golf Invitational Portland

...stay tuned.....

Tennis

The first round of Wimbledon 2022 kicked off Monday and the highlight thus far are:

1. Serena Williams got the boot by Harmony Tan in a three-set nail-biter**.** We’ll cut Serena some slack though… this was a crazy return nearly a year after she dropped out due to a torn hammy.

2. Soonwoon Kwon forced #1 Novak Djokovic to 4 sets. But Djokovic came out on top.

3. #1 Iga Swiatek swept Jana Feat 2-0.

F1

The British Grand Prix is the same weekend Americans are celebrating their independence from their former colonizers. And who said F1 didn’t have a sense of humor!? Anywhooo here’s what you need to know

• The Course: Silverstone Circuit is one of the longest and fastest of the season. This could give Ferrari an edge who has the quickest car, but don’t discount Red Bulls superior DRS system. Silverstone also features ridiculously tight corners so don’t be surprised if we get a collision.

• The Favorite: Charles Leclerc. I swear I’m not trying to jinx him because he’s been the favorite for the past few races only to DNF or miss podium. Charles knows this and is more pissed than me getting screwed by the guy I had to convince myself was cute in the first place. This pretty boy doesn’t often get mad, but when he does, watch out ladies.

• The Dark Horse: Mercedes have won 8/9 out of the last British Grand Prixes, and I think with history (and luck) on their side, they can steal a podium spot from Red Bull and Ferrari

• Off The Track: 2022/23 regulations allow cars to be way lower to the ground. This makes them faster but it also causes a phenomenon called porpoising (AKA, a bouncing motion for drivers when going fast on straights.) Imagine sitting on top of a jack hammer, and that’s kinda what it feels like. Drivers are complaining about their safety, but their teams don’t want to sacrifice speed. Wait....putting $ over workers well-being? Welcome to capitalism.

Want to see what porpoising looks like? Try watching this without getting SEVERE car sickness

Must Watches This Week

Wednesday, June 29th

• 7pm ET, Boston Red Sox vs. Toronto Blue Jays, MLB: These teams are battling it out in their division. The Jays have already gone up 2 games… can the Sox avoid a sweep?

• 7pm ET, Philadelphia Phillies vs. Atlanta Braves, MLB: We have another divisional showdown in this series, and the Braves have proved their spot in the standings in game 1. Let’s see if they can do it again.

Time Out for the Tea

Brittney Griner’s detention extended by another 6 months as she awaits trial

~Viewer discretion advised~

• Valeri Nichushkin was a key piece to the puzzle… that being the Colorado Avalanche’s Stanley Cup victory. But apparently he had to play through a pretty narsty injury to get there.`