Ball Girl #089: Do you remember, the 21st night of September?

Today is a great day. Not only do we get to play the absolute BOPPIEST BOP of all BOPS, but we also get to watch this incredible video of Eli Manning posing as a walk-on named ‘Chad Powers’ at Penn State’s open tryouts. If you are down in the dumps today, do yourself a favor and watch this video cause Eli with a mullet, a fake nose, and screaming “THINK FAST, RUN FAST” delivers like an overnight FedEx.

Can I have your number?

1,526: Number of ATP matches Roger Federer has played to date. Federer will cap his career this weekend at the Laver Cup in the UK.

TLDRs;

⛳ The 2022 Presidents Cup kicks off Thursday at Quail Hollow Club in Charlotte, North Carolina. The tournament features a different play format for each day — foursomes Thursday, fourball Friday, foursomes & fourball Saturday, and singles Sunday. All LIV Golf pros are banned from the event.

🎾 The 2022 Laver Cup starts Friday at The O2 Arena in London (lowkey only important this year because it will be Roger Federer’s last tournament before retiring).

🏈 Monday night football recap! Philadelphia Eagles 24, Minnesota Vikings 7 — Kirk Cousins (Vikings QB) provided another mediocre performance on primetime television and the Eagles slayedddd thanks to interceptions from Darius Slay Jr. (cornerback) and Jalen Hurts (QB) putting the team on his back. Buffalo Bills 41, Tennessee Titans 7 — Josh Allen (QB) and the Bills delivered 34 unanswered points in the latter half of this game to embarrass the Titans.

⚾ Aaron Judge hit his 60th home run of the year in the Yankees’ win against the Pirates last night. Only six players have ever done this in the history of baseball. He’s also the first person to hit 60 since the steroid fueled era of the late 90s. Stay tuned to see if he can break Barry Bonds’ record of 73 💪

🏀 The NBA and the NBAPA are ~moves fingers in pinching motion~ disssss close to reaching an agreement to lower the eligible draft age from 19 to 18. This change would mean that players could graduate high school and go straight into the league without having to play any college ball. This hot topic debate has huge implications for both players and the NBA, so grab your popcorn and your diet cokes. The show is only getting started.

🏒 Yesterday was a sad, sad day for NHL fans around the globe, as we witnessed the retirement of not 1, not 2, but 3 great players. These included the likes of Zdeno Chára (age 45, 24 NHL seasons), Keith Yandle (age 36, 16 NHL seasons), and P.K Subban (age 33, 13 NHL seasons). Read on for a deeper dive into P.K’s controversial but impactful legacy.

NHL

Na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, hey hey hey, goodbye…

• Let the karaoke theme continue… after 13 seasons in the NHL, P.K Subban is officially retiring at the age of 33. That may seem young, but keep in mind, the average age in the NHL is 27, and the average number of seasons played is merely 5. So by all means, Subban is a gramps.

• During his career, P.K played for some pretty incredible franchises: the Montreal Candians (2009-2016), The Nashville Predators (2016-2019), and The New Jersey Devils (2019-2022).

• P.K. was a total trailblazer for the sport, representing just 1 of 6 black players in the NHL in 2009 (the year he entered the league). He was also the first black player to ever win the Norris Trophy (awarded to Top Defensemen) in 2013. And to top it off, he donated $10 million to a children’s hospital in Canada in 2015. With a resume like that, how could you not adore the guy?

• Well, our guy P.K was a highly controversial player. P.K was notorious among fans and fellow players for 1) diving (read, fake falling down to get the referee to call in your favor, aka, the ultimate weenie move) and 2) playing ridiculously dirty, even by a dirty sport’s standards, by slewfooting his opponents.

• What in the zamboni is slewfooting, you ask? It’s when a player uses his body to trip another player, taking his feet out from under him. This is crazy dangerous because the tripped player will often hit his head against the boards or the ice. You could field a team with all the players P.K. has injured this way: Sammy Blais, Ryan Reaves, Milan Lucic, and Trevor Zegras — and that was just in the 2021 season alone. No wonder he has earned the nickname “slewfoot” (no one said hockey players were very creative…).

• But hey, they say all press is good press, and if nothing else, P.K got the fans out of their seats… whether they were cheering or booing.

Must Watch This Week

Wednesday September 21st

• ⚾ 2:00pm ET, Milwaukee Brewers vs. NY Mets

• ⚾ 6:40pm ET, Tampa Bay Rays vs. Houston Astros

• ⚾ 9:40pm ET, San Diego Padres vs. St. Louis Cardinals

Thursday September 22nd

• ⚾ 4:00pm ET, San Diego Padres vs. St. Louis Cardinals

• ⚾ 6:40pm ET, Toronto Blue Jays vs. Tampa Bay Rays

• ⚾ 7:15pm ET, Philadelphia Phillies vs. Atlanta Braves

• 🏈 8:15pm ET, Cleveland Browns vs. Pittsburgh Steelers

Time Out for the Tea

Serena Williams pulling a Tom Brady?

• Serena Williams (who just retired after her US Open appearance) “joked” with Jimmy Fallon on The Tonight Show that it may not be over for her just yet, stating “Tom Brady started an amazing trend. That’s what I want to say.” Shortly after, Williams’s husband Alexis Ohanian tweeted the below, alluding to his hope that his family can “vacation over winter break”… aka, live a normal life following Serena’s retirement. What do we think??? All just banter?? Or will we be seeing Williams back in another epic Nike outfit again?

The latest on Brittney Griner

• Brittney Griner, WNBA star, has been detained in Russia for almost eight months now and was sentenced to nine years in prison. While the Biden Administration has been open about its efforts of negotiating Brittney home, Biden says the process has been very complex, though the administration is “determined to get a deal done.” However, according to Brittney’s wife, Cherelle Griner, who has been exchanging letters with Brittney, Brittney’s mental health is suffering as time goes on, reporting that Brittney is “not well” and “she’s losing it.”