Ball Girl #095: In the words of Will.i.am... Where is the love

Numerous outlets have broken the story over the past 24 hours that Brady and Gisele have apparently hired divorce lawyers :( SOB. ICYMI, the couple have been on the rocks ever since Brady suddenly announced his un-retirement apparently without consulting Gisele, who was getting excited about the idea of finally having the father of her children around. But Brady seems to be ADDICTED to football… makes sense, as he was clearly born to play! I’m not taking TB’s side just yet, but c’mon, Gisele….you had to know that man was going to die on the field. Lesson learned: maybe it sucks to marry the hero after all.

Can I have your number?

13 years & 7 months: Yep, it’s what you thought… Tom Brady and Gisele Bundchen have actually been married that long. In celebrity world, that’s like 14x the average, but we’re still in shock to hear this split might actually happen.

TLDRs

🎓🏈 After seven seasons with the Wisconsin Badgers, head coach Paul Chryst was released, just 5 games into the season. Controversial, given that Chryst amassed a 67-26 record during his tenure. So why’d they’d let him go (no, it’s not because they love him…)? Our best guess is that Wisconsin wants to be a top #10 team. Chryst had them sniffing but couldn’t quite break the barrier into the creme de la creme of college ball.

⚾ Aaron Judge hit his 62nd home run of the season — surpassing George Maris’ 61 year old record in the American League. And the regular season officially ends today, which means playoff baseball is right around the corner…

🏀 Not to jinx it… but Ben Simmons might actually play for the Brooklyn Nets this year! ICYMI, Simmons willingly chose to sit out the entire post season for Brooklyn for ‘mental health’ reasons, in a very controversial decision, to say the least. But he has been suiting up and balling for the Nets’ preseason. Let’s just hope Simmons has learned to address and deal with his emotions — but then again, he is a man, so he probably just stuffed them under the rug.

⛳ Shriners Hospitals for Children Open takes place this weekend (starting tomorrow) at TPC Summerlin in Vegas, babyyyy! Just like the last few tournaments, the field is stacked with new faces, though fan favs are certainly layered in (Sungjae Im, Patrick Cantlay, Max Homa, Tom Hoge, etc.).

🏈 MNF featured a west coast showdown: SF 49ers 24, LA Rams 9. The Rams (defending Super Bowl champs) were the favorite going in but the Niners & JimmyG brought the HEAT (reminder: the 49ers signed Jimmy to a one year contract last minute but now find themselves relying on him since their chosen QB1, Trey Lance, broke his ankle). Highlight: Jimbo threw an absolute dot (read: very accurate pass 🤓 ✅) to receiver Deebo Samuel, who escaped 5 tackles to get the Niners a solid lead going into the second half. The Rams just couldn’t catch up after that.

NBA

Phoenix Suns are looking for a Sugar Daddy as the team expects to sell for a record-breaking price

• Owning a sports team has suddenly become hotter than owning a Le Champ Bag in 2009, the only difference being a few more zeroes on the price tag.

• The Phoenix Suns NBA franchise is the most recent team to go on the market after 17 year owner Robert Sarver was accused of racist and misogynistic behavior and fined $10M.

• Sarver purchased the team back in 2004 for $401M. Forbes now values the Suns at $1.8B (& not just because Kendall Jenner’s boo, Devin Booker, is their star player). But talk about cashing in on your investment!!

• Joe Tsai currently owns the record for paying the most for an NBA team, having paid $2.35b for the Brooklyn Nets, aka, that team that has become a bigger let down than the season finale of Game of Thrones.

• The Suns now pose an opportunity for a new Daddy Warbucks to take Tsai’s place, especially considering the current potential buyers are Jeff Bezos (yup, of Amazon), and Steve Jobs’ widow, Laurene Powell Jobs. Shaquille O’Neil (former Suns’ player, current favorite GIF shaking his shoulders) has also expressed his interest. Given his net worth is only $400M though, that’s looking like a long shot for our big boy.

Must Watch This Week

Wednesday, October 5th

• ⚾ 4:00pm ET, Miami Marlins vs. Atlanta Braves

• ⚾ 4:00pm ET, NY Mets vs. Washington Nationals

Thursday, October 6th

• 🏈 8:15pm ET, Denver Broncos vs. Indianapolis Colts