Ball Girl #124: Your Weekend Sports Recap

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Drama, records, and receipts — this week in sports is juicier than a TMZ headline. Ovechkin is rewriting history, Kyrgios is stirring the tennis pot, and Ohio breaks Texan hearts. Buckle up, Ball Girl fam — this one’s good.

🏒 NHL

Ovi vs. The Great One: The Final Countdown
Alexander Ovechkin is on his villain arc, and Wayne Gretzky’s all-time goal record (894) is looking real nervous. Ovi bagged career goal No. 873 in the Capitals’ 4-1 win over the Preds, meaning he’s just 22 goals away from hockey immortality. Oh, and he just casually hit 20 goals for the 20th straight season — something only Gordie Howe has pulled off. Ever. The Caps, meanwhile, are heating up with a seven-game point streak, and rookie Ethan Frank even stole a little spotlight, netting his first career goal in just his second game. Keep your eyes glued to this one, folks — history is knocking.

Connor Hellebuyck: The Avs’ Personal Nightmare
The Colorado Avalanche might need therapy after this one. Connor Hellebuyck just pitched his third straight shutout against them (sixth this season) as the Jets cruised to a 3-0 win. Winnipeg finally snapped a rough patch, thanks to Nikolaj Ehlers setting the tone with a goal 68 seconds in — talk about a rude welcome. Mark Scheifele chipped in another, and the Jets' defense put the clamps on, holding the Avs to just 22 shots. Note to future opponents: if Hellebuyck is in net, bring a therapist because the frustration is real.

🏀 NBA

The Knicks Woke Up and Chose Violence
New York’s finest absolutely bullied the Milwaukee Bucks in a 140-106 beatdown, and Jalen Brunson was that dude — dropping 44 points on 16-of-26 shooting. Karl-Anthony Towns played cleanup crew, racking up 18 rebounds with 30 points. The Knicks dominated every single quarter, while Giannis (24 pts, 13 rebs) looked like a one-man rescue mission in a sinking ship. The East better take notes — this isn’t just a hot streak, this is a whole vibe.

The Kings Keep Stacking Wins Like It’s Black Friday
That’s seven straight Ws for Sacramento, baby! De’Aaron Fox made his comeback tour official, dropping 26 points in a 124-119 win over the Bulls. Domantas Sabonis showed off his Swiss Army knife skills with 22 points, 16 rebounds, and 8 assists — a little bit of everything. Zach LaVine stayed on fire with 36 points (his sixth straight 30+ game), but Chicago just couldn’t handle the balanced Kings attack. If you thought Sacramento’s streak was a fluke, think again.

🏉 College Football

Ohio State: Just Give Them the Trophy Already
The Buckeyes are one step away from another natty after taking down Texas 28-14 in the Cotton Bowl. Jack Sawyer had the defensive play of the year, snatching up a fumble and taking it 83 yards to the house. Quinshon Judkins punched in two rushing TDs, and TreVeyon Henderson added some flair with a 75-yard catch-and-run touchdown. Texas QB Quinn Ewers tried to make his revenge game happen (283 yds, 2 TDs), but Ohio State’s defense had other plans. Next up? A showdown with Notre Dame for all the marbles.

🏈 NFL

The first round of NFL playoffs — the Wild Card round — is almost done and dusted! Some teams’ seasons were put to bed and others are just starting to heat up. Here’s a rundown of the teams that advance after this weekend:

Kansas City Chiefs
No surprise here: the Chiefs secured the No. 1 seed in the AFC, which means they got a bye week. They needed it, too — their injury report is longer than my Netflix queue. But even with all the bumps and bruises, a 15-2 record and QB Patrick Mahomes at the helm means they’re still favorites to win the Super Bowl (again).

Detroit Lions
The Lions are the No. 1 seed in the NFC, so they also had a bye. In the last 4 years, this team has gone from a joke to a contender faster than you can say “Dan Campbell’s motivational speeches.” With an inspirational coach like Campbell, a talented squad, and a lot of personality, the Lions are easily the people’s choice for this year’s Super Bowl.

Houston Texans
Okay, who had this on their NFL playoffs bingo card? After a rough start against the L.A. Chargers, Texans’ QB C.J. Stroud and RB Joe Mixon decided to go full "we’re not here to make friends" mode and overpowered coach Jim Harbaugh’s previously promising team. This is only Stroud’s second season in the NFL and he is playing like he has something to prove. They’ll take on the defending Super Bowl champs next weekend: Kansas City.

Baltimore Ravens
The Ravens and QB Lamar Jackson put the Pittsburgh Steelers in their place like they were sending back cold fries at a restaurant. Jackson reminded us all why he’s an MVP candidate, running the ball for more yards than any other game this season. The Ravens will go on to face the Bills next week… and that matchup won’t be as easy.

Buffalo Bills
Speaking of the Bills, their playoff future was temporarily in question when the Denver Broncos took the lead early, but QB Josh Allen wasn’t about to let that happen. He might as well be wearing a cape at this point and is another MVP contender. We’ll see if it’s enough to top Jackson and the Ravens next week.

Philadelphia Eagles
The Eagles took down the Green Bay Packers like they were just a minor inconvenience in the grocery store line. With star running back Saquon Barkley chewing up yards and QB Jalen Hurts back from a concussion, the Eagles looked like a well-oiled machine. WR A.J. Brown was so unbothered, he was spotted reading a paperback on the sideline. We’ll see if they can stay this casual in next week’s matchup against the winner of the Vikings/Rams game.

Washington Commanders
In an evenly matched feud, the Commanders secured the win with a field goal with just three seconds left in their matchup against the Tampa Bay Buccaneers. Rookie QB Jayden Daniels worked some magic to end the Bucs’ season, and now he and his Commanders are off to Detroit for round 2.

Watch: Minnesota Vikings at L.A. Rams, tonight at 8:00pm
In the last game of the Wild Card round, the Vikings, aka the team with a 14-3 record that somehow no one is talking about, are ready to make some noise. QB Sam Darnold, the former career backup, has something to prove this year. The Rams, on the other hand, are looking to run back their 2022 Super Bowl victory with the same electric duo: QB Matt Stafford and WR Cooper Kupp.

Gossip, Gossip, Gossip

Kyrgios vs. Sinner: Tennis or a Telenovela?
ICYMI, Nick Kyrgios has been one of the loudest critics of Jannik Sinner’s doping controversy, repeatedly calling for harsher punishment. Sinner, who twice tested positive for an anabolic steroid in March 2024, received only a one-month suspension after investigators ruled the violation unintentional. Kyrgios took issue with the light penalty, arguing that the sport was “cooked” for allowing such leniency. Well over the weekend, tennis commentator Jon Wertheim just dropped a bombshell, claiming Kyrgios' grudge against Sinner isn’t about tennis — it’s about his ex, Anna Kalinskaya, who’s now dating Sinner. OOF. Kyrgios, ever the king of chaos, fired back on social media, saying his beef is about "integrity in the sport" — not his ex. Sure, Jan. They are both playing in the Australian open tomorrow and there is even a chance the two face off. Why is this giving Challengers???

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There you go, queens. Hot tea, hotter takes, and a whole lot of action. Until next time — Ball Girl out.