Ball Girl #68: It’s just another manic Monday

Particularly Sunday, September 11th when we have 14 — yes, 14 — NFL games on the calendar to open the season. I literally don’t know how I’m going to pick and choose between these games but as we enter August, the ultimate lull of sports, I’m just out here looking for some hope 😩.

Not me with a literal countdown clock…

Can I have your number?

165%: Difference between this weekend’s golf tournament first place prizes. First place prize at Rocket Mortgage (PGA) was $1.512mm, while first place prize at Bedminster (LIV) was $4.0mm. Brutal.Number based fact here

TLDR

⚾ The Houston Astros and the Seattle Mariners dealt each other blows in a tense series this weekend. Read on for more.

🏈 Training camp continues and so do the juicy news stories. Read on for more.

⚽ The England women’s soccer team won the 2022 Euro final! Read on for more.

🏁 The Hungarian Grand Prix had an identical podium to the French Grand Prix just a week prior- deja vu! AKA, Max Verstappen came in first, Lewis Hamilton in second, and George Russel in third. Read on for more.

🏀 Bill Russell passed away at age 88 this past weekend. Russell played 13 seasons with the Boston Celtics, during which he garnered 11 titles, 5 MVP awards, 12 all-star selections, and 3 all-NBA first team honors. Aaaand he was awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom by Barack Obama in 2011. Talk about an absolute KING.

🎓🏉 Alabama scored another sick recruit this weekend — Richard Young, a running back from Lehigh Acres, Florida. Young is ranked the top tailback in the 2023 class and the #14 prospect overall. College football nation better watch out for that Crimson TIDE.

🥊 UFC fighter Amanda Nunes reclaimed her title as double-champ Saturday night in what I can only describe as a MAULING of Julianna Pena. Read on for more.

⛳️Tony Finau won the Rocket Mortgage Classic and $1.51mm, marking back-to-back victories. Meanwhile, Henrik Stenson won the LIV Golf Invitational Bedminster and took home $4mm. Read on for more.

MLB

Astros and Mariners trade blows (no, not literally)

• We saw an ugly series between the Houston Astros and Seattle Mariners this weekend. Luckily, the Mariners held off on storming the field and starting another brawl like they did w the Angels earlier this season.

• First, on Saturday, Mariners’ All-Star Julio Rodriguez was hit in the hand by a pitch and put on the Injured List. Then, in the first pitch of the game on Sunday, Mariners’ pitcher George Kirby hit Astros star Jose Altuve with a 95mph fastball. The pitch was likely ordered by Mariners Manager, Scott Servais, and it was BAD. See for yourself below.

• The Astros came out on top this series, but if there wasn’t already, now there’s some bad blood between these two teams for sure.

NFL

Training Camp News

Reminder — NFL training camp (preseason practice) is in full swing. Here are the biggest news stories from all over the league:

• Turns out not playing sometimes gets you paid. Deebo Samuel, one of the best young wide receivers in the league, finally got his $73.5M bag from the San Fran 49ers after a brief “hold-in” (meaning, he attended practices but wouldn’t participate).

• There’s drama going down in Carolina Panther territory — Baker Mayfield is competing with Sam Darnold (drafted 3rd overall in 2018 but has flopped since) for QB1. Baker might win the starting job at QB, but he lost his famous “At home with Baker Mayfield” Progressive Insurance commercials (…thank god).

• HBO went and found the hardest of knocks for the next season in the Detroit Lions. If you haven’t heard of Hard Knocks, it’s a reality show where HBO follows around a really bad team in preseason. That’s it.

• Aaron Donald (defensive lineman for the LA Rams) really out here choking people to get ready for the season. Check it out:

Golf

Finau does it again

• Tony Finau won the Rocket Mortgage Classic yesterday, becoming the first player since Brendon Todd (2019) to win in back-to-back weeks during the regular season. Finau went 5-under yesterday for -26 total… 5 strokes better than Cantlay, Pendrith, and Young, who went T2. Finau brings home $1.51mm for his dub, while the T2 players bag $636k.

Stenson wins in LIV Golf debut

• Henrik Stenson won the LIV Golf Invitational at Bedminster, 11-under for the weekend, taking home a massive $4mm prize (something PGA Tour players have straight-up never seen). This was Stenson’s first tournament in the series. Dustin Johnson and Matthew Wolff finished T2, 9-under for the weekend, both bringing home $1.81mm.

UFC

Well — that was a revenge f🦆.

• In December 2021, UFC witnessed one of the greatest upsets in history. Julianna Pena defeated then 5x back-to-back champion Amanda Nunes for the Bantamweight (125-135 lbs) belt. Oh, and by the way? Nunes was also the holder of the Featherweight belt (135-145 lbs). Why is a feather heavier than a bantam? No clue, folks.

• Anyways, the pair faced off again this past Saturday night. The fight went the full five rounds but Nunes went boxer turned artist — a gruesome metaphor for how she literally PAINTED the ring with Pena’s blood.

• Nunes now stands as the current champion in both Featherweight and Bantam once again and had the ultimate victory walk to show for it.

F1

Sorry, Ferrari!

• It was another BRUTAL weekend for Ferrari with both drivers missing podium. Pretty boy Charles Leclerc came in 6th and teammate Carlos Sainz came in 4th. All things considered, these aren’t awful finishes… but Mercedes is getting awfully close to leapfrogging Ferrari in the Constructor’s Standings (competition for the team that finishes the season with the most points

• Okay, but enough about the losers. Max Verstappen came in first after starting in 10th — Reminder, the Hungaroring is notoriously narrow and slow, so making up that much ground is more impressive than me rallying to go out Friday night, Saturday day, and Saturday night.

• We now head into a four week F1 hiatus for our drivers and their mechanical teams to recover. Catch you back in on August 28th when I’ll be sobbing the demise of summer but the return of F1!

Soccer

Girls all over the world love elevated surfaces

• The England women’s football team defeated Germany this weekend to win the 2022 Euro final. It was a tense match full of penalty cards and outright tackles.

• After the game, the team crashed the press conference with team manager, Sarina Wiegman, dancing on the table and singing “football’s coming home” (a classic English football song — yes, those exist).

Time Out for the Tea

Biden Administration officially made an offer to bring Brittney Griner home